The voice you listen to...

"All too often we bemoan our imperfections rather than embrace them as part of the process in which we are brought to God. Cherished emptiness gives God space in which to work. We are pure capacity for God. Let us not, then, take our littleness lightly. It is a wonderful grace. It is a gift to receive. At the same time, let us not get trapped in the confines of our littleness, but keep pushing on to claim our greatness. Remind yourself often, “I am pure capacity for God; I can be more.”

- Macrina Wiederkehr from A Tree Full of Angels

I have been thinking a lot this week about what voice I listen to.  Is it my own self talk or do I listen too much to others and therefore it becomes ingrained into my psyche and that is all I hear?  I have several things that brought this forward this week.  One is the quote above from The Sojourners daily email that I receive.  I think it is interesting that God gives us unlimited capacity to learn and grow and become who we were meant to be, but yet we, as humans, limit ourselves so much!  Why?  God has basically given us the world- literally he has given us the world.  So why is it most of us don't take it?  I certainly have limited myself to my square corner.  I am wondering if it is because we don't understand the limitless capacity that God has.  That as humans we cannot physically imagine all of that goodness, that greatness that lies within all of us.

Secondly, I have gotten some ideas from the first class I am taking in my online quest to obtain my  paralegal degree.  It is called "Strategies for Success" and basically it is for those of us who haven't been in school for 15 years, etc.  We have a series of videos to watch and they are done by a man named Lou Tice, I will admit when I first starting listening to Lou I rolled my eyes.  He is obviously a motivational speaker and those kind of speakers normally make me gag with their fluffy rhetoric.  But after 3 weeks, Lou has me hooked.  The video I watched yesterday was about self talk and how our self talk becomes either negative or positive.  Lou said that when we replay negative speech or situations in our mind, it becomes a part of us.  Interesting.  So for the past 24 hours I have been listening to how I talk to myself and what situations I tend to replay.  And in that time I have begun to switch my self talk to only positive things and despite my eye rolling at Lou's advice- he's right.  I can tell the change in my attitude today.  I don't think I will instantly stop being a worrier or that my inner anxiety will change, but just since starting this blog and determining that this is the new path that I WILL walk has changed my habits.

Lastly, I was watching the All-Star game Tuesday and yes I was thrilled that the NL finally won after a 14 year drought and that when the Rockies when the division and then the pennett, the first game of the World Series this year will be played in Colorado.  Yes I believe in Rocktober!  But what caught me was a song that was sung at the beginning of the game, a song I have heard many times and disregarded (no not the Star Spangled Banner) but a song by Christine Aguilera "Beautiful".  A song she obviously wrote as a young woman for women and maybe for their own self talk.  

So these are the things I am thinking about today- God's limitless love for us, my own self talk and how I can begin to practice changing that.  

But to keep you up to date with my weekly goals- I have been able to eat three meals a day this whole week- healthy meals.  I have stopped snacking after 9pm, but I have not made the walks or yoga yet.  I am going to rearrange my school schedule and fit these items in.  

A new goal- to allow the greatness that God has planned for me unfold within.  Maybe that should be your goal too?  What is holding you back?

Peace-

Melinda